He said he had 500 bucks 3 days ago,
but then he met the girl with the big glass jar.

He spent three days spending his money,
But now he is out of money
and the relationship is over.

So now, he needs a ride out of this tiny nowhere town;
but he has no money. He said he was calling his dad.
He added that his 26th birthday is in two days. "Maybe my dad can send me money?"

He said he feels trapped and he told that he was feeling like he should "suck on carbon monoxide and end the pain."

I found him carrying around a pillowcase full of items in the home where he spent a night, while the owner wasn't home. He wants a place to stay tonight. I must find a way to tell the owner that it would be a bad, no, a very bad move.

He said he was sorry for ripping the sheets in my office to build a fort. Said he was too high, too high, needed to feel safe. He said he needs to get out of here.

Now I am sitting here trapped, waiting for the owner of this house to come home, so he doesn't come back in with his pillowcase. I am nervous around his ran-out-of-speed vibe. It literally had me choking back this ball of puke because my gut was on this guy.

Talking to the fast talking man, as he is coming down. Was twisting me into knots. I have a really empathic side, one that would normally jump up and help, but this liar, thief, creepy guy, well my gut was tumbling, making me queezy, do I ask what's in the pillowcase? I can see it's not a pillow. It has lumps, like it's full of stuff.

Will he hit me, or freak out if I challenge him here in the empty neighbor's home? What was he in jail for? I had him sitting down long enough to get a partial story. I don't believe much from the story. Partial truth, to sound legit, but I know the parts he is lying about.

"She said I could sleep in your office."

That was the biggest dumbest lie he told because if he could remember through his haze, back 24 hours ago, he would remember I kicked him out of my office and said stay out.

But he was so high and scared he built a fort out of my sheets, in my office. Had a few of my items in the corner, the unplugged TV, everything was piled up around where he said he got a few hours of down time, leaning against the wall.

My sister died of organ failure at 26 years old. He doesn't understand I know how fragile this life thing we've got going on is. He doesn't know what it does to me to hear him talk about sucking carbon monoxide or giving up.

What was he in jail for? He slipped and said he just got out of jail. He said he was trying to get to NOLA but his truck was broken down. He said a guy he knows said you can make 1000 bucks a month and that his friend is making 140 a week after only being there a few weeks.

He said can I use the phone to call dad to ask for money. He said he was tired of No respect. Tired of no respect. Gotta give some to get some buddy.

We are such a fucking beautiful miracle and then some asshole invents speed and we all have to meet guys like this, and the woman who supplied it.

So here I am camped out, hoping my neighbor comes home soon. Wondering if the man will come back here tonight. Wondering what was in the pillowcase. Is it my stuff? My neighbors? His stuff?

In the end, the stuff is less important than what speed is doing to the minds of healthy people. Making them dum and crazy over time.

Hope someonebody out there quits tonight, just as surely as someone is picking up their first pipe.